Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts

Thursday, June 5, 2014

Playgroup for Capuchin pet monkeys in South Africa.


To find a playgroup where your toddlers will be safe and well looked after is already a challenging task and finding one for your Capuchin pet monkey is next to impossible. Poppie Botes, owner of the “Queen of the Jungle” playgroup for monkeys is an animal lover in Johannesburg, South Africa who realised the need for this when she acquired two Capuchin monkeys of her own three years ago. At the time she owned a home industry shop and had to take her two children, as she calls them, with her where they were kept in a little cage. “Other people who also had monkeys for pets brought them to play with my three year old Amy and Kerneels because they get very lonely and need to be with their own kind,” she informed me. She then decided to start a playgroup where people could bring their Capuchin monkeys to spend the day. Poppie now has five monkeys that visit her playgroup every day of which the youngest is Jesse at five months old.





She converted a huge veranda at her home into a cage that is connected to an ever bigger cage outside by way of a wire pipe. Owners of these delightful little animals drop them off in the morning on their way to work and pick them up again at night, just like working parents with toddlers would do. She cares for these monkeys with patience and love as if they are little kids. In the morning they are fed a bottle of milk formula as well as baby porridge and for lunch they have cooked chicken, eggs, a sandwich and lots of raw fruit and vegetables during the day. They also drink fruit juices and tea and once a week are treated with sweets and cookies, not too much because they are prone to diabetes. At birthdays they have a birthday party with party packs filled with lovely goodies that they open and eat themselves.



There is a jungle gym in the outside cage with swings and toys where play and keep themselves busy all day long as well as a small pool where they can cool off in summer. “My toddlers need lots of attention and stimulation and I make sure they are entertained during the day,” she said. The cages are cleaned every day and kept in immaculate condition, because when one becomes sick, all of them do. They are treated for illnesses the same way as humans because being a primate they are very similar to us. Like any other kids they love toys and play for hours with stuffed toys and cars and every afternoon take a nap with a favourite blanket or soft toy.



Every night Poppie’s babies bath themselves and are fed a bottle of milk formula and put to bed wearing a nappy. Their bed is a specially adapted baby cot that stands in her bedroom next to her bed. They play for a while or watch television before falling asleep. “Our friends and family know that Amy and Kerneels are part of our family and treat them accordingly.” 



Apart from them she also has an African Grey parrot, a Macaw parrot, four bearded dragons, four budgies, an iguana, five guinea pigs, five silky chickens, nine koi fishes, eight dogs and one cat!
Capuchin monkeys are extremely intelligent and can be taught to understand and execute instructions and commands. 



Helping Hands, an organization in the US train these amazing animals to assist people with spinal injuries in their everyday lives. Watch this video for more information.


To have a Capuchin monkey as a pet is a lifelong passion, not just a passing fancy, because they can live for up to 45 years, and need lots of attention love and patience and require hard work. They have to be fed certain foods every day and be kept in a big cage to move around and play. However it is worth the effort since they are loving and affectionate little creatures.


Friday, May 16, 2014

Don't you ever give up hope!

“His eyes were sunken like an old man’s eyes, a maggot crawled on his bottom lip and a roaring insane scream escaped my lips. This zombie like dead creature wasn't my beautiful son, there had to be a mistake. This nightmare wasn't going to end and I was slowly losing my mind because my son could not have hanged himself in a weeping willow tree, I couldn't bear the thought of that.”

For years I tried to get that image out of my mind, nothing I did could erase it from my memory. Suicide is considered murder in South Africa and that meant my son Emile’s body wasn't treated with dignity and respect and he started decomposing by the time we had his service. No matter what that inconsiderate action would do to me. I donated his organs and his eyes weren't replaced with prosthesis leaving him looking like a monster. The horrifying and mutilated person didn’t resemble my beautiful son.


When you reach that place when life doesn't seem worth living anymore and suicide feels like the only option left please think about what you are going to do to the people who love you more than you can ever realise. They are not going to be better off without you, in fact you are going to destroy not only the ones you want to punish but the innocent ones as well. No problem you are struggling with is worth taking your precious life over. You are so much more than that.

The moment you have taken that last fateful step of suicide, there is no turning back, there is no rewind button and you can't erase what you have done because death is permanent. A permanent solution to a temporary problem that will leave destruction and agony in its wake for the ones who love you more than you could ever imagine. Some problems only feels as if it will last forever when in fact it is only a fleeting part of your life. When I saw my son dead that morning I felt helpless because there was nothing I could do to save him. Death is the most final thing that can’t be rectified or changed. It truly is the end.


My son Emile felt that the demons plaguing him was too much to bear and on a lovely summer morning in February of 2006 we were called to the park where he hanged himself in a weeping willow tree the previous night. Not only did he take his own life but a huge part of mine as well. The anguish and hell I lived from then on almost destroyed me and for the longest time my sanity were slipping and it hanged precariously over a gaping cliff. I hated and loved him in equal measure and I struggled with a myriad of emotions all in one day. The whole situation was incomprehensible to me, it couldn't have happened, my son couldn't be dead. I soothed his pain while he was growing up, he was not only my son but my best friend. I felt that I completely failed him and I wasn't worthy to have been his mother.

I am not judging anyone for feeling desolate and contemplating suicide because I have been there countless times without thinking about the effect it will have on my family. Anything that happens in our lives never lasts forever even unbearable pain and suffering come to an end. Right after Emile took his own life he got a fantastic job offer but it was too late and he was gone forever. Everything started happening the way he wanted it but he couldn’t wait just a little longer.

I was lost in absolute madness with grief and I don't wish that state of existing for even my worst enemy. Families are torn apart because everyone feels guilt and regret about their relationship with the person who left in this way. Not only do they blame themselves but each other and most families can’t survive it.

You are wonderful and uniquely made and you deserve an amazing life and if you can hold on for a while longer and brave the storms of your life, you will be so happy you did. You are a warrior, a soldier and I implore you to take up your sword and fight your demons. There is no struggle in life that you can’t overcome because you mean the word to countless people. You are stronger than you can imagine my beautiful friend. Every person, including you are an important piece of the puzzle we call life. If you take your own life you remove an intricate and vital part of the meaning of life. Please don't give up and give in to the hateful siren that is suicide. Don't let it lure you into thinking it is the best thing to do, suicide is a vicious liar and will steal away your life with that last step into madness.




Monday, September 2, 2013

Evil emotions masquerading as something pure...

The human is a very complex being and we can show emotions that look the same but are opposites in fact. It is very hard to see the difference because the evil one parades as the other smoothly. I will tell you a little about only three of them.  They are attachment masquerading as love, pity as compassion and indifference as equanimity.  
When you love someone you want what is the best for them, you want them to be happy and fulfilled in life. You give them freedom to be what they are best. Attachment on the other hand wants that entire person in an unhealthy way. They use the word love to manipulate and stifle the other person’s growth and happiness. They act as if they love someone to coerce them into doing what they want or to be someone they want them to be. You can also see this with some parents trying to live through their children, making them dependant on them. Love on the other hand will let them grow and live responsible and great lives.
Compassion means empathy and caring for someone on a deep level. It is feeling equal to them and wanting to be there in times of trouble. When you can actually feel what someone else is feeling not just feeling sorry for them. Pity makes one feel superior to someone else. Glad you are not in their shoes. It is looking down at someone who is struggling to survive. It can look the same way but it isn’t. Compassion is a noble feeling where pity is the complete opposite. Many people act with compassion but really are thanking god they are not in that person’s situation. And when it comes down to it they won’t be there to help.
Equanimity is the ability to overcome great tragedy in one’s life. It means the capability to experience tremendous pain but being able to get through it and accept things and move on in life. It is the aptitude to survive life’s difficulties and see the beauty still around you. It also means when you can stay composed in stressful situations. Indifference on the other had is the evil opposite of this, looking like you are handling things where you in fact feel nothing at all. To not be able to feel deeply for anyone and just acting like they do. This is the worst kind of opposite because inside they are hollow empty beings. They lack the ability to feel anything at all.
Blessed Be and Namaste!!




Thursday, August 29, 2013

Angels surround us even when life is at it's darkest.


The road is dark and treacherous and danger lurks everywhere. You are tired and terrified, stumbling along with no hope. You feel your feet slipping on wet stones and your hands fly around to find purchase. Suddenly you feel arms holding you upright. A thorn from a bush snag on our clothes and you feel the hysteria welling up in your being. Soft hands loosen the snare and you sigh in relief. A snarl comes from the foliage and a horrible mangled face appears with bloody fangs exposed. A shriek escapes your mouth, but the unseen hands push the monster back to where it came from.

Soft whispers in your ear soothingly encourage you to move forward. “You are not alone, we are with you to protect you”. Suddenly a golden light appears in the distance. You feel dread and hope in equal measure well up inside your torn heart. “We will reach the light, do not despair,” the words fill you mind. You wonder if you will make it to the light, so much darkness and evil surround you right now. You near the light while trying to walk without falling down on the uneven path. It seems so far to go and you feel the helplessness enter your mind again. “Keep going,” the whispers urge you, “it is not far to go now.”

Your foot hooks on a root and you feel your body pitched forward but the hands are there to stop your fall. The golden light is becoming brighter and for a moment hope soars in your heart. Your mind tells you it is just an illusion like all other hopes that died in you. “Don’t give up, it is not far to go now,” the loving voice tells you. Hope starts to swell inside you and you walk faster, determined to make it. The light is right in front of you and you can hear voices singing and praising the creator. The songs fill you with longing and wonder. As if you have taken a huge leap you are in the light. The soft golden love of it enters your soul, mind and body. You feel glorious acceptance and joy and you face open in a smile. You look around for the presences which brought you here but everyone is around you now.

Angels with beautiful snow white wings enfold you and chant the song of love. Your heart wants to burst with the love and joy you feel. God is here and you are safe now. Peace has entered you mind and you know you are not alone in this world. The angels of God is around and guiding you all the way on your path. You know you will have to go back to reality but for the moment you wallow in the beauty of the moment. Never again will you feel alone and loveless, you know the place that awaits you and the guardians who safeguard your every step in life. God will never leave you alone to suffer, no matter what the dark forces tell you. This life is but a moment to endure before eternity. The love, peace and joy of God await you at the end of it.
Blessed Be and Namaste, my fellow travelers.

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

We need to learn tolerance...

Intolerance – refusal to accept differences, unwillingness or refusal to accept people who are different from you, or views, beliefs, or lifestyles that differ from your own, bigotry, prejudice, narrow-mindedness, fanaticism, small-mindedness. This is what intolerance means and how many people do you know who are guilty of this?

We see this every day and it makes me feel so sad to think we can do this to each other. We are all in this life and world together, and apart from our differences why can’t we accept each other for who and what we are instead of pushing each other away?
I don’t care what you believe in or what your race or creed is, you are my brother and sister on earth. We are all connected in some way or another. There is a saying in Wiccan circles: First do no harm. Why can’t we live like this together in peace in harmony?

Why do we have to hurt each other and offend and criticize our different ways of living?  None of us have all the answers and we can ask questions but not to belittle someone in the process. We should stand together against the onslaught of evil forces and love each other the way we are supposed to.
What is happening in our world that we can’t stand to hear someone else’s view or opinion on a subject. Life is already so difficult and if we can tolerate each other and love one another, it will make it easier for all of us.
Blessed Be



Thursday, August 15, 2013

Our souls have a spiritual knowledge...

Have you ever met someone and felt that you have known them all your life? When the way they speak and act feels so uncannily familiar to you? I think when we sleep our souls travel and meet up with other souls we have known before we were born or are destined to meet. Can you imagine meeting like that in the universe and just being together without the interference of our bodily needs and emotions? Just pure cosmic togetherness and entwined with other souls we connect with in the spiritual dimension.

I don’t believe anything happens by chance or coincidence. The people we meet on this earthly plane are not unknown to us. How can we meet someone and fall so irrevocably in love with each other as if that love has always been there? Perhaps we feel so deeply for that person because on a spiritual plane we have already met and fallen in love.

I have this image in my mind of souls meeting in mid-flight with joy and intense love. Entwined and filled with cosmic belonging. Spiritual adoration is more than just caring about someone because we feel a connection with them that we can’t explain. We know them on a deeper level because our souls have a relationship that has been there for eons.

We make friends with people we feel a deep infinity with and we experience things in life together because that was destined for us. Even if the time we have with someone here on earth is only for a little while we treasure those precious memories forever. The earth is so vast and it isn't always possible to be together forever because of the distance that separates us. We meet people we will never ever forget and we think about them with fondness and longing for the rest of our human lives.

There is a knowing that can’t be rationalized with realistic arguments. I’m sure you have met someone and ask yourself why you haven’t met years ago. With some relationships the only way we can connect is with the life experience we have at that time in our lives. Maybe if we met earlier we would not have had that deep affinity with them. Things need to happen first that can give us a deeper understanding of each other. 

So tonight when you go to sleep you will possibly meet another soul that is going to play a very important role in your life for years to come. Could be that it is not wishful thinking when you meet someone you feel is your soul mate, not only in love but also in friendship.
Namaste!




Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Don't let depression destroy your life

If you have suffered from depression you will know the helplessness and despair of living with it every day of your life. Real depression is not like the blues where you can pull yourself out of or “pull your self together”. It is a debilitating illness that can destroy your life as well as those around you. I have suffered from depression for 17 years which became acutely intense when I lost my son Emile. With the help of the right medication and therapy I am able to live a normal life again. Unfortunately when you have a chemical imbalance in your brain it takes time to find the right medication that will work with you. There are also all kinds of different depression a person can suffer from. I don’t have much knowledge about all of them only mine which is where the brain has an imbalance of serotonin.




A person who doesn't suffer from and have never suffered from depression has no idea what it is like to live with it. They think we can just make a decision and be over it. If only it was that easy. After my son Emile died I couldn't get out of my bed to do anything. There was no reason for me to live any more, or so I thought. Suicide was a calling siren that occupied my mind day and night. I was absolutely obsessed with death and wanted it to fetch me right away. You can’t explain this to anyone, they think you are insane or pitying yourself. For you at that moment it is reality and feels like the only way out of the unbearable pain and despair you are feeling. I tried to follow Emile on two occasions but it wasn't meant to be. I tried grief counseling, trauma therapy and talking to other depression sufferers.
Nothing seemed to help me. Then after a suicide attempt someone referred me to a psychologist that uses cognitive behavioral therapy to treat his patients. It teaches you to control your emotions and grief and not let it control you. When you are suffering from depression you are very emotional and when your mind starts running away with you, you feel completely helpless against its onslaught. We are the master of our minds not the other way around. However, we need to learn to control our minds, and it is not an easy task. With every thought we start a pattern that can lead to a loss of control and ultimately to a feeling of complete despair.
One thought of pain and unhappiness leads to another worse one and before you can stop it you are in the midst of darkness that feels completely encompassing with no way out. With that comes the feeling of madness as well. At one stage I thought I was losing my mind and with just a step in the wrong direction I was going to go insane and never be able to come back again. It truly felt as if I was hanging onto sanity by a thread. Your mind is very powerful if you let it be. It can make you feel utter despair, helpless, useless, of no account to life or those around you and that life has no meaning at all. Fortunately with the right therapy and medication it can be overcome and used to make life worth living again.
Meditation was another great tool that helped me see things in reality and not the way my mind was
distorting it. It helps to empty the mind of all thoughts and concentrate on something positive, like the love of God. It wasn't easy in the beginning because my thoughts seemed to have their own life. With lots of practice I used that on many occasions to center my thoughts on the positive and everything I still had to be thankful for and reasons to live. Life is a wonderful gift and we are here for a reason so don’t let your depression take the joy of life away from you. If you need to talk to someone please feel free to contact me, I know what you are suffering through. We are all in this together.
Blessed Be and Namaste!

Why me?

Have you ever asked yourself this question “Why me”? When your heart has been broken and it feels as if your life has come to an end. I wondered about this after I lost my son Emile to suicide on 5 February 2006. After a lot of soul searching I came to the conclusion that it was meant to be. How else could I have learned to feel compassion, sympathy and real empathy if I never felt the unbearable pain of loss? Kahlil Gibran says: “But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure, then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor, Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.” How very true these words are. How can we truly live and love if we don’t give it our all? When the rug has been pulled from under our feet and we have lost our footing in life, then can we really begin to feel love and compassion for others. We can’t go through life and care about the world and other people if we haven’t been broken and walked the path of healing. Why not you and I? What are we better than others not to experience the most unbearable pain on earth? We can’t grow if we haven’t truly felt out heart scatter into million pieces. Real life is not just roses and moonshine, it is to feel lost and broken and alone, and have the courage to get up and start all over again. I want to laugh all of my laughter and weep all of my tears and feel deeply for humans and God. I heard a saying once, when you are down the only way is up. Don’t feel that your life is over now that you have lost so much and your heart is broken, now is the time to get out there and feel and live this beautiful life God has given you to live. Go out and learn your lessons even if it breaks your heart. You are not alone, God has a plan for you and if you accept your fate it will be revealed to you. Every minute of every day is a gift to make life and the world a better place. I say to you now if you coast through life without a care in the world you will learn nothing worthwhile and your soul will never grow. I thank God for the opportunity He gave me to learn lessons in life and be grateful for life, the little time I have here on earth to grow as a soul. Don’t waste it on regret and guilt. Try to make right where you erred and give it your all. It is but one teardrop in the ocean of life. When death comes for you one day, you must be able to say; I have lived and I have learned and I have loved with all my heart.
Blessed Be

Our children, Our all

We carried our children for nine months and gave birth to them and took care of them most their lives. When they fell down and scraped a knee we were there to kiss it better and wipe off their tears. When someone was hateful to them we would tell them they are wonderful and beautiful. If they didn't succeed in something we told them it didn't matter and we love them. It doesn't stop when they grow up and start leading their own lives. With adulthood comes other problems and we are still there for them. How it breaks a mother's heart to see her child taking drugs and destroying their lives. What immeasurable pain it is to see your child in a prison cell convicted of murder or something else. It doesn't matter how our children's lives turn out to be we will always be their mothers and love them. It makes no difference if they become successful and live a good life or if they fail and take the wrong paths, we love them unconditionally. And we will always love them. When you see a young man in shackles led to a prison there is a mother somewhere who is crying for him. When you see a young man begging on the streets there is a mother somewhere who worries about him. If you see young girls on the streets selling their bodies for drugs, they have a mother who wants what is best for them. I know this is not always true for all children but I bet it is for most. We do the best we can to make our children's lives good for them to the best of our abilities. It hurts so much to see your beautiful child suffer mental illness and there is nothing you can do to help him or her or take it away. You ache so deeply when your child suffers from depression and they feel unworthy of life. When your child becomes involved with bad things you wish you can take them away from it and make them see what they are doing to themselves. We lie awake at night wondering if our kids are safe and if they will come home. The worst thing for a mother is to let go of her child when they reach the age to become independent. No matter how old your child is they are you precious jewel. We stand by helpless and see them stumbling and making the wrong choices in their lives when all we want to do is take them in our arms and tell them we love them. Every mother will understand what I am writing here. We just want the best for our kids and we will go to any lengths to make that true. All mothers make mistakes and the wrong choices but our intentions are good. When you hold that innocent little baby in your arms you just want the world to be good and wonderful for him or her. Unfortunately it doesn't always work out that way and our hearts break for them over and over. For all mothers suffering out there in the world, I salute you! WE stand united against the world for our kids!!
Blessed Be and Namaste.